Praise God! Shortly after writing last month’s newsletter, I found out that lying prostrate on the ground was just a test, a training session, practice for the real challenge ahead. As a regular listener to Food for the Journey, I heard Sr Ann Sheilds describing a booklet she had written called “Hope in the Midst of Suffering.” She recommended giving this to people who were suffering sickness or pain, to help them unite their suffering to Christ. Guided by The Holy Spirit, I ordered and started giving these booklets to the people who were really suffering physically, as a means of help. Shortly after, I was talking with a friend about his uncle who still worked as a cardiothoracic surgeon at 85. I asked him how he could work for that long and he told me that he prayed before every surgery. That was what kept him going. The next day in prayer in adoration, the Lord put it on my heart to pray with my patients before every surgery. Even after lying prostrate I was still a little afraid of jumping completely out of the boat.
Now for years I had been asking the Lord if He wanted me to change my job to become a missionary or lay minister, but I had never gotten an answer. So I took that as a “stay where you are”. Though I truly enjoy my work and helping people, I would find myself getting tired after long days and frustrated at times with how hard the work could be, especially never being completely sure this is what God wanted me to do as a disciple. So this time there was no resistance. I told the Lord that if this is what he wanted, I would do it. I enlisted my secretary, a wonderful Holy woman, to tell my patients that I would offer to pray with them before surgery, to see if it was all right. She immediately told me a story about a surgeon who once joined in prayer with the Priest just before surgery and how great her sister thought that was. This gave me more encouragement. I decided to start the next week.
The first patient was a nurse, and about to have a knee replacement. She was as nervous as anyone that I had ever seen before surgery, like she wanted to run screaming out of the hospital. She was crying, sweaty, clammy and even squirming a little when I entered the room. She was afraid to have the surgery; afraid she was going to die. What she did not know is that I also was very sweaty and nervous about praying with her. It was my first time. I am not sure who was squirming more her or me. The Spirit gave me a prayer that I rehearsed about 100 times so I would not forget. I asked to hold her hand and prayed, “Dear Father in heaven, thank you for bringing us here today to help Deb with her knee. Please send your Holy Spirit to heal her body, mind, and soul. Please Lord, guide my hands during surgery and afterwards, speed her recovery. We ask this through Jesus Christ our Lord. Amen.” During the prayer, I could feel the Holy Spirit flowing through me to them. Karen started crying and both Karen and her husband were immediately calmer, and smiling, thanked me, shaking my hand as I left the room.
I have to say I was pumped, kind of skipping down the hall, rejoicing for the gift that God had given me! He sanctified my work! He has given it eternal purpose and great joy. He has freed me from the fear of praying with my patients. I wondered if this is what the apostles felt like when they had cast out demons in Jesus’ name. I have done this ever since and am surprised that only 2 people of the first 50 patients have said, “No” to praying with them. If we are obedient servants in small things, the Lord will give us more to do. Praise God! Amazing Grace!
During adoration recently, the Lord asked me to do something and I said, “No.” It was at the adoration chapel I go to on Thursdays, during lunch for an hour, a very small chapel where there is seating for 4 people only, facing each other in the shape of a cross, and the body of Christ is concealed in a copper green metal tabernacle in the center of the room. God wanted me to pray lying on the ground, on my face, in the sign of the cross. "No way, no how, nuh huh, not going to do it," I thought. “There are 2 other people in here. This is embarrassing.” So I started to bargain with God in my mind! “If you clear all these people out, I will do it,” I thought. So I waited. The two people who I originally asked God to clear out left about 15 minutes later, so God actually held up his side of the bargain. But one new lady came in. I could not bring myself to do it. All the excuses ran though my head… I will wrinkle my tie. The floor is dirty. I have to go back to work. I'm not sure my 6'3" frame will fit. This lady will think that I am crazy… So at my usual time, I left, disappointed in my weakness and myself.
After I left, I vowed that I would lie in the shape of a cross and pray the next time that I went to adoration. The next day my email had the following daily Divine Mercy inspiration from the Diary of St Faustina (If you wish to get this daily reflection click this link Flocknote Divine Mercy Daily):
"I am surprised that you still have not completely renounced your self-will, but I rejoice exceedingly that this change will be accomplished during the retreat (Diary, 369).
[Then] I heard these words: I am with you. During this retreat, I will strengthen you in peace and in courage so that your strength will not fail in carrying out My designs. Therefore, you will cancel out your will absolutely in this retreat and, instead, My complete will shall be accomplished in you. Know that it will cost you much, so write these words on a clean sheet of paper: "From today on, my own will does not exist," and then cross out the page. And on the other side write these words: "From today on, I do the will of God everywhere, always, and in everything" (Diary, 372).
My Prayer Response:
Lord Jesus, may Your love strengthen me to do Your will everywhere, always, and in everything. May I live the "Our Father" petition: "Thy will be done!"
Do you think God was trying to tell me something!?! God’s love of Saint Faustina always gives me great strength. I prayed this prayer, truly asking God for strength to do his will. I did not want to be the son who said he would do it and then didn't. I wanted to be the son who said no and then went and did his father's will anyway. That next Sunday afternoon, I went to my own church where the perpetual adoration chapel is a beautiful chapel on the backside of the altar with seating for 25, where the body of Christ is always visible. Because it is perpetual adoration, I knew that at least two people would be there, but this time I didn't care. And it happened. I walked in and immediately laid face down right in front of Jesus and prayed the our Father once and then got up and kneeled in the pew the rest of the time. Sadly, I was still embarrassed. I am not sure if the other adorers even noticed or not, but I didn't care. I thought, “There, I did it!” and thanked God for this gift.
I once read a story that just before his first audience as Pope, they could not find Saint John Paul II. The young priest who was supposed to have him there on time could not find him anywhere. In a panic, he asked an older priest who knew better where he might be. He told him to check the chapel and the young priest told him he had already
checked it twice. The older priest told him to check it again, but this time look at the floor. When he walked into the back of the papal chapel he again saw an empty dark chapel. But this time he walked to the front of the chapel and checked the floor and there, face down, lying with his arms outstretched like on a cross was Pope John Paul II, praying. I have prayed like JP2 a few more times since then and it is a beautiful way to pray. Always remember, be not afraid!
Dear Intentional Disciples,
Praise God! Be not afraid! This past month, an Unbound conference came to Omaha and the Holy Spirit descended into a small basement room filled with over 300 faithful followers, including 20 priests and nuns, underneath a small church. “How he loves us” and “there is power in the name of Jesus” was played by a local Catholic band to open the evening. The priests prayed for the Holy Spirit to come down into the room and fill all of our hearts. Neal and Janet Lozano got up and talked about deliverance prayer and ran the whole room through the prayer and God delivered us. Many were set free. I was set free.
A friend from my men’s group, who likes to refer to himself as the bold and the humble, told me I needed to go to this conference. I prayed about it in adoration, and the Holy Spirit wanted me to go. So I went. I knew nothing about the conference or what it was about before I went. I truly thought that this was a retreat and nothing more. I thought that there would be prayer, adoration, and worship. There were all these things, but there was so much more.
The Unbound lectures taught us all how we can be bound in sin by lies and how we can be freed in the name of Jesus. Neal told us many stories of people who became free. There was a story for everyone, one to which each of us could relate. Stories of miracles; heartbreaking stories of evil things that happened to children from which they were freed in the name of Jesus. There are 5 keys to the process. Neal led us through them all. The first is Faith and Repentance. Jesus wants us all to “repent and believe in the good news.” Mark 1:15. To start our journey towards freedom, we must turn away from sin, ask God for forgiveness, and begin walking towards Jesus, having faith in the Divine Mercy of Jesus. “Father, please forgive me. I am sorry for my sins. Have mercy on me a sinner.”
The second and most important key is forgiveness. “Forgive us our trespasses, as we forgive those who trespass against us.” To be free, to receive forgiveness from God, we must forgive as Jesus wants us to forgive. “Then Peter approaching asked him, “Lord, if my brother sins against me, how often must I forgive him? As many as seven times?” Jesus answered, “I say to you, not seven times but seventy-seven times.” Matt 18:21. With the help of the Holy Spirit, we were walked through our life, taken to all of those places that we needed to forgive, all the memories of things that needed forgiveness. Then we all forgave everyone. “In the name of Jesus, I forgive my brother for not protecting me. In the name of Jesus, I forgive my Dad for not loving me the way he should have.” Memories that I had forgotten more that 30 years ago came back. I forgave them all, even things that I did not know needed forgiving. Thank you Jesus.
Next we renounced all the evil spirits, much like our vows of baptism. “In the name of Jesus, I renounce Satan and all his works and all his empty promises.” But the unbound process is much more specific. We renounced all of the evil and lies in our life. He led us through all the lies that the devil tells us, most of which lead to fear, fear of doing the right thing, fear of loss of something in this world that we don’t need, fear that keeps us from God the Father. Neal explained how evil only enters our lives if we open the door. Jesus, through the sacrifice of the cross, has given all of us the power to close the doors we have opened to evil. Using the example of St Theresa of Avila, the devil was described like a chained dog. As long as we stay away from him, he can never harm us. “In the name of Jesus, I renounce the spirit of fear of failing, fear of not being good enough, fear of being rejected…” “I renounce the spirit of anger, hatred, criticism, pride, greed, lust, rejection, the lie that I am worthless, the lie that everything is my fault, the lie that I can’t stop my sin, the idol of money, fame, success, that I can do it all on my own. I renounce the spirit that I am in control, that God has not completely forgiven me in confession,…” We also broke any curses or bonds that had occurred in our lives, including any curses our parents put on us or anything we gave away by fornication. “In the name of Jesus, I break all the curses that so and so put on me including (then we named the curse; eg. you will never amount to anything, no one could ever love you, you are worthless.) In the name of Jesus, I break the bond of so and so (name of the past lover outside marraige) and I take back what I gave to them. We renounced everything that keeps us from God’s love and mercy. We had faith in the power in the name of Jesus, that He had already broken all the chains in our life.
Step 4 is Authority. Neal reminded us that Jesus has all the authority in this world. “Then Jesus approached and said to them, ‘All power in heaven and on earth has been given to me.’” Matt 28:18 We know that in the name of Jesus the disciples were able to heal the sick and cast out demons. This is still true right now. So, “In the name of Jesus, I command every spirit that I have renounced to leave me right now.” And they did.
Then we were given the Father’s blessing, a beautiful gift from God. God loves us more than we know, like sons and daughters. He blesses us, speaks to us, gives to us so that we can have life to the full and the peace of God always in our hearts. If you know that God loves you and always will, nothing can separate you from this peace. We know that going forward, God helps all of us on our way if we completely depend on Him and not the world and its’ lies. The one thing that brings us happiness is always resting in God’s love, to know the gift of Father’s blessing.
After the conference, I was rejoicing in the Lord for days, but I was not really sure how much this would change my life. The following week, I went out on our door-to-door evangelization and realized that I was free. I was free from the fear of sharing my faith with strangers. I used to worry walking up to each person’s door. But this time I was free to let the Holy Spirit work through me in all the prayers that I said that day. God, through the conference, had blessed me more that I realized. Praise God! I also use the 5 steps regularly along with the sacrament of confession, anytime fear, lies or sin enter into my thoughts. I renounce the spirit of the sin and then cast out that spirit in the name of Jesus. This has truly changed my life.
The next time someone invites you to something good, pray about it and go. It might just change your life.
Intentional Disciples July Newsletter
Praise God! A couple of weeks ago on our door-to-door evangelization, a nice couple invited us in their home. We asked them if there was anything or anyone that we could pray for in their family. The mother asked us to pray for her daughter Dawn who had been blacking out during her pregnancy. We told her we would be happy to pray for her. She then told us the story of how Dawn first blacked out.
“Dawn was driving on a busy three lane highway in the inside lane. I was in the passenger seat and Dawn’s sister was in the back seat behind her. Dawn’s 4 year old was sitting in a car seat in the back as well. When Dawn passed out, the car crossed 2 lanes into the shoulder before I realized what was happening. I grabbed the wheel and barely kept the car from slamming into the guardrail. Problem was we were still going 60 mph in the shoulder with no way to stop. Dawn’s sister managed to dive into the driver’s well headfirst and push the brake and they came to a stop without anyone being hurt. Dawn woke up about a minute later and seemed fine but we were generally shaken up. I turned to the back seat and asked the 4 year old how she was and she was smiling and said she was fine. I asked, “Weren’t you scared?” The 4 year old answered, “I was not scared, the nice lady stopped the car.” “What lady?” “The lady in the fancy dress with the purple gloves and she had a crown on her head. She was standing in front of the car and stopped it with her hand.”
They realized that Our Mother Mary had saved them. What a blessing! The child saw Mary stop the car, but the adults were unable to see. Jesus calls us all to be humble like a child so that we can receive the Father’s love like a child and believe like a child.
This month, I want to focus on this important trait of discipleship, humility. God calls each of us to be a humble servant, a child with our eyes wide open, listening to God. Christ Jesus, the Lord of the Universe and the King of all kings was born in a manger in the middle of horse manure and pig slop. He was completely obedient to his parents. Imagine how humble he had to be when his mom asked him to wash behind his ears and take out the garbage. “But Mom I just washed the whole earth during the flood.” And just before his biggest sacrifice, a painful death on the cross for our sins, He washed his apostles nasty feet! Something only servants would do.
John 13:3“So, during supper, fully aware that the Father had put everything into his power and that he had come from God and was returning to God, he rose from supper and took off his outer garments. He took a towel and tied it around his waist. Then he poured water into a basin and began to wash the disciples’ feet and dry them with the towel around his waist. …So when he had washed their feet [and] put his garments back on and reclined at table again, he said to them, “Do you realize what I have done for you? You call me ‘teacher’ and ‘master,’ and rightly so, for indeed I am. If I, therefore, the master and teacher, have washed your feet, you ought to wash one another’s feet. I have given you a model to follow, so that as I have done for you, you should also do. Amen, amen, I say to you, no slave is greater than his master nor any messenger greater than the one who sent him. If you understand this, blessed are you if you do it.”
I am in awe of the way Jesus humbles himself in the Eucharist. Every hour of every day, the Lord, the God of the universe allows his flesh to be eaten and his blood to be drunk. We can take him in our hands and eat. Oh, how he must love us! To be disciples we must humble ourselves like our master humbles himself every minute of every day. God should mold our lives however He sees fit. But we cannot be humble servants on our own. It is too hard. We must lean on Christ. For me, my pride often makes me irritated when I am folding laundry, or hanging Christmas lights, or cleaning up the broken whatever because I am focused on myself. What helps is thanking God for teaching me to be humble like Jesus.
Christ must be the center of our lives, our hero, our rock star, our American idol, and the one we look up to more than anyone else. We need to let God lead us, to be our commander and rely on His help with the humility of a child. Therefore, in our lives, God, Father, Son and Holy Spirit, must be #1. We also must have someone to serve. Therefore, Everyone else must be second. And who does that leave for third? Us. Challenge yourself this month. Get a piece of paper, write, “I am third” and put it on your bathroom mirror. Read it every morning and try to live it. Secondly, go out of your way to do one nice thing a day for someone you know and thank God for the chance to do it. If they live with you it is easy. Play cards, take them to a movie, get them some ice cream, pray with them, do the things that they have been asking you to do. If they are not at home write them a letter, send a present, pray for them, fast for them, visit them if they are close. Be a humble servant centered on Christ!
All In For Christ!
Paul
